Have you ever received bad news that it shocked and hung you upside down emotionally?

Your life has been serendipity and peaceful like calm water flowing in a river during the Springtime.

Then your phone rang. You answered it and were excited to hear a familiar voice from a good friend of yours. You expected the unexpected. Suddenly, the smile on your face wiped away very quickly as you were listening to the voice at the other end of the phone call. In a few minutes the conversation ended.

You’re left alone, confused, sad, and angry with the mixed feelings. Did I just hear that right? You asked yourself.

The lively energy that you had a few minutes before you took the call just vanished into thin air.

Was there a time when you received a bad phone call like that?


I sit and listen to the sound of the ocean’s waves crashing and bringing with them the seaweeds and debris onto the shore. Birds are swirling around and swooping down to catch whatever just washed onto the shore after waves subside back into the opened sea.

One form of life had been eaten by another form of living. Sadly, it is the cycle of life.

I’m taking in the bad news and want to have a quiet moment with nature to myself. I want to be alone quietly at a beach. Just nature and I.

I sit and observe my surroundings, emptying my mind, reflecting on what I’m blessed and grateful for in life for a few hours.

At least I’m healthy and am not being eaten alive as the birds are eating other life forms off the shore.

You see, I got a call from a friend informing me that someone we both knew from Khao I Dang Camp had died from a very painful and slow death. It was very sad news to say the least. She was so young and beautiful.

I believe she lived and made the most out of her life while she was alive. Definitely, she was loved by so many people who knew her.

The camp was not your typical summer camp that you might be accustomed to here in the Western world. The camp I’m referring to is a concentration/internment camp where my friends, my family, and ten thousand of other refugees had lived before migrating to a third world country to start our new and better lives as most of us had hope.

For many of us who survived living in the refugee camps and made it out alive, it was truly a miracle. It brings back so many memories that I won’t go into detail here.

It’s getting cold. The sun is ready to call it a day and let the night takes over. With the smile on my face, relief feeling, and a sense of acceptance about the bad news, I’m ready to head back home.

I’m done for the day!


As I am slowly walking uphill on the stairs, I hear birds noises to my left. I look over quickly and see two big crows and two tiny birds. The two small birds are flying swiftly, pecking at one of the crows and making so much noise.

In just a blink of an eye, the crow viciously grabs one of the tiny birds in one swoop with its beak.

I was totally shocked and disbelieve as you heard my reaction in the video. Disbelieve that the crow just killed one of the tiny birds and tried to swallow it immediately. It seemed like it had not been eating for days. But it couldn’t do it because the bird was too big for it to swallow down it throat.

Things just happened so quickly within a few split seconds. I didn’t catch the hold scene on the video. I was thinking the birds and the crow are playing with each other. I didn’t know the crows eat the flash. I thought they eat only non-meat stuff. Did you know that?

After the whole ordeal was over, I realized that the two tiny birds were fighting to protect each other lives. They fought to save their partners’ lives. They were tiny brave birds I’ve ever seen. They didn’t just let the crow had it so easily. They fought with all their might.

It appeared the crow had experienced at killing.

I was feeling guilty that I could have stopped the crow from killing the other bird if I had known the crow wanted it a meal.

Why does it have to happen when I’m there?



How am I going to restore my state of mind? The peaceful mind that I had a short while ago is gone. The moment of quiet and at peace gets interrupted once again.

I don’t want to drive home just yet and decided to stand on the stair looking at the calm ocean as the sun was going down for some time to regain mental strength in the moment.

It’s getting darker and calm down a little.

As I was driving home, I keep seeing the images of the birds and hearing their noises. One struggled and fought hard not to be killed. One is alive, it is still hopping around the area and crying for its partner in the video.  The hungry vicious crow flew away with a dead bird in its beak for food.

I feel bad and guilty of not able to save the tiny precious life.

In my mind, I’m dealing with two deaths. One, I’m struggling to accept earlier, and the one I just witnessed. In both deaths, the loved ones, who are alive, are suffering and crying in pain. So sad.

Before falling asleep for the night, I must have a clear understanding. I don’t want to wake the next morning carrying the horrible situations of today over.

Here are what I do to overcome these particular situations:

  • I accept what is and what is not.
  • I accept that death is part of the cycle of life. It is the reality we are living in regardless of how painful it is.
  • I accept the tiny bird might probably be eating by some other predators if it were not eaten by the crow.
  • I accept the birds’ incident as another wake-up call and a lesson learned.
  • I accept that it is not my fault that I could not save the tiny birdlife.
  • I accept every situation is not under my control.
  • I choose to let go of the painful attachments… It’s not 100% released yet. But it’s a lot better than 100% retaining the pain.

Both situations remind me all lives are significant regardless of who you are or what life forms. 

I need to treasure, enjoy and make the most out of my life in this moment. Don’t live as I will never die.

We all know we will die. I believe you too should make the most out of your life while you are healthy and alive.

How are you intend to live your life?

A part of living a fulfilling life is to create a paradise within. That is to know what and when you want to accept the reality NOW.

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